Ten Thirst Traps You Might Get Sucked Into Forever

Men have accused women of setting thirst traps on Instagram. This is ridiculous and here’s why.

If you think about it pretty much everything in life can be described as a thirst trap. Neurologically speaking we’re all just trying to make our brain release endorphins so we can feel high.

It’s like when Captain Ahab endangers the lives of his crew to obsessively hunt Moby Dick.

But what’s this long face about, Mr. Starbuck; wilt thou not chase the white whale? Art not game for Moby Dick? — Captain Ahab

Moby Dick in Space.
Moby Dick in Space.

The feeling you get when you see someone attractive is a natural chemical reaction all animals experience. As an adult female I would say that over 95% of sexy pictures online are that person trying to attract a mate, or make it big in the Industry. Rest assured it would take a brooding sociopath to intentionally trap someone. We all experience rejection. There is no international conspiracy to make anyone feel like less of a person.

Instead of shooting up the whole school because you can’t get laid, work on becoming successful at a positive thirst trap. You will be a more confident person because you have a life, and this will reflect itself in your carriage. Most of these lifestyles include groupies after you reach a certain point. So follow your thirst trap — unless your thirst trap is a celebrity or anyone you have met in real life or online.

Thomas Robson
Thomas Robson
  1. Sex

I read that something like 80% of all the images on the Internet are of naked women.  Some people have sex on the brain all the time. Ironically it’s often people that say they don’t want any children. The sex thirst trap can lead to sex addiction issues, a career in the porn industry, HIV status or even all three!

Source: The Examiner
Source: The Examiner
  1. The Industry

No one knows exactly what industry we’re talking about, but it may have something to do with fame. There are many different ways to achieve notoriety among the common people, including art, music, TV, film, modeling, publishing, politics and sex. Some go on cross state killing sprees and these people are bat shit crazy.

Mad Men Season 5 Cast Photo
Mad Men Season 5 Cast Photo
  1. Advertising

We are bombarded with paid messaging throughout the majority of our lives, especially in big cities. Many advertisements are for stuff that nobody really needs, but they try to make it seem like life will be completely better if you exchange your money for a good or service. Most of the population just needs to survive.

Source: LinkedIn
Source: LinkedIn
  1. Money

It’s not difficult to have money if that’s all you want. Man is the only animal on the planet that needs currency in order to live. Technically you could get all primal and return to hunting and gathering in the forest primeval. But after a while that would totally suck ass, and you would want to take a hot shower.

womenpower.jan_.2012

  1. Politics

Most thirst traps are a quest for power, although some people have genuinely good intentions. Getting involved in politics is one of the most direct ways to institutionalized power, and it’s a good way to fly cool jets and stuff. The military complex and various police forces are a branch of the politics thirst trap.

Bart-Simpson

  1. Technology

Social media is the biggest thirst trap since sliced bread. You could spend several combined hours per day scrolling through your feed on the mission for more followers and social media interactions. The tech industry is a kind of thirst trap where geeky computer developers try to outsmart each other.

Source: Global Rant

  1. Drugs

Alcohol is literally a thirst trap. At first it tastes horrible but you consume large amounts of it anyway, which makes you incredibly sick. Eventually you develop a tolerance to beer, wine and liquor. You may even start to crave the cool sensation of the beverage travelling down your throat to warm the belly.

Religions-world-map-watermarked

  1. Religion

Religion was bigger when the Pope ruled the world. There’s still a massive war over religious law spanning the Middle East that makes millions of young men feel included. What they really need to do is let the women read and vote so that somebody in the country has a clue about what they’re doing.

h

  1. Sports

Since the Olympic ages it has been a great honor to represent your geographical locality in the field of sport. College and professional athletes enjoy incredible perks such as free Odwallas and gym memberships. But they have to maintain a competitive advantage in order to stay in the game.

Yeosu University
Yeosu University

10. Academia

Some people enjoy the university so much that they decide to never leave. Although teachers provide an invaluable service to society, some are in it for research grants and tenure status. Just like in sports you have to be the best and brightest. Students have committed suicide over their GPA.

I guess my point is that you should follow me on Instagram @blackbettyblog. You can find a link to my profile by scrolling down to the foot of the page. Like and comment on my pics, and stop being a baby.

What’s your thirst trap? Let us know in the comments section below!

Posted by blackbettyblog

Elizabeth de Moya has a BA in Linguistics from UC Berkeley. She has contributed to DJ Mag, DJ TechTools, LA Weekly and Thump (Vice). Check out the new women's street fashion and music blog for people that love EDM and music festivals: sluttyravercostumes.com!

Leave a Reply